Thursday, September 23, 2010

Notes to Self

1. Hormones and alcohol are not a wise combination.

2. No matter what the label says, the mascara is not waterproof.

3. Please remember, Jane, you are lactose intolerant.

4. Hormones, stress, alcohol, and human interactions are really not a wise combination.

5. Most people will not ever get it. This is OK and has nothing to do with you.

6. If you're going to insist on mucking about in other people's shit, don't be surprised when you feel like shit.

7. There is no such thing as altruism. At best, there is enlightened self-interest.

8. Predictive text will continue to think you mean "pkwy dike" when you really mean "okey doke".

9. Predictive text will also continue to think you mean "puffed" when, in fact, you really mean "pissed".

10. You fail only when you stop trying.

4 comments:

Betsy said...

I'll buy the set. XOXO

Diva said...

That should read "Notes to Everyone." *smile*

PJ said...

thankfully I don't have predictive texting but I have to say the text of pkwy dike made me giggle a lot.
PJ

dwight said...

i'm going to start using pkwy dike in every day situations.