Wednesday, December 29, 2010

King Tut-a-what?

Lex's mom came into town and treated us to the King Tut exhibit at the Denver Art Museum yesterday.

Cool. Right?

Since both Lex and I had to work, she purchased tickets for the 3:30 group and so he and I scurried over there as fast as we could and made it just in time for our exhibit time slot...

Along with eleventy-billion other people.

We stood in a cattle line - like the lines at security at the airport except without the potential of a thorough pat down - for about an hour, inching ever closer to the door of the galleries. Lex's mom assured us that a friend of hers had gone earlier in the day and had said once we got into the galleries, the crowd would thin and we would be able to move about at our leisure without feeling claustrophobic.


When we finally were granted access to the first gallery, the scene was a bit like this:

Photo courtesy of Forest L. Norvell

Except with more people and more shoving and less punk rock music.

There were also a lot of little kids. Kids who were tired, cranky, hungry, uninterested, and general menaces to society.

And some kids who were, from all appearances, sick. One 'lil darlin' in particular, about 3 years old, was busily blowing snot rockets...

Photo from Blogging Like I've Never Blogged Before - original source unknown

In my direction.

Which, I suppose, might have been better than all the children (and adults) doing this...

Photo taken from Giant Robot Invasion! - original souce unknown

But not by much.

Plus, the image of the snot rocket is WAY better and by better? I mean grosser.

Lex took off by himself right away. He'd been tense and unhappy just in the line so this did not surprise me. Frankly, if you know Lex (or have some idea about how much time he spends in his room when people are over - which is to say all the time), you'll understand that just the Disneyland line was enough to freak him the fuck out.

At first, I tried. No really! I totally tried to enjoy the exhibit and tried to see everything there - at least, in that first gallery. Eventually though, after having to wade 7 people deep to get close enough to just read the information above each artifact but not able to get close enough to actually see most of what was being displayed, I got frustrated, then freaked out, then thoroughly disgusted.

And I gave up.

I practically ran through the remaining galleries, occasionally stopping to read a placard, but, most often, just trying to navigate the sweaty, germ-ridden masses to the exit.

I was inside the exhibit for about half the time I stood in line. Which, come to think of it, is a way better ratio than, say, the Disneyland line.


Nothing about it was worth the money spent to get me in there.

Sure. We did a few things "wrong". We waited until the exhibit was on its last 10 days of a 6-month layover; we waited until it was the winter break; we waited until 3:30 when the masses were out in force. Had we gone at 10 a.m. or, say, 5 p.m., we would have had fewer people - or at least fewer snot-nosed kids - with which to contend. Had we gone during the week, say, in October, it probably would have been less crowded too.

But! I also blame the museum for making the experience feel like a cattle call and I also blame poor and thoughtless parenting.

What I definitely know is this:

By the time I got out of there and after Lex found me outside chain-smoking in an attempt to calm my nerves, I was more ready for a cocktail than I have perhaps ever been.

Next time? I'm totally just going to buy the book.

Because photos like this one?

Photo courtesy of Steve Evans

Are WAY better than the exhibit.


ed said...

yeah, i think we lucked out. we went at 1pm on the tuesday right after thanksgiving. no line getting in, minimal crowding in the first few galleries, few children (including ours, 11 and 9). the lack of sarcophagi irked me. but it was still cool.

sorry your visit was lame.

oh, and what's with snot rockets lately? a buddy of mine posted that someone snot rocketed at the grocery store she works at. on the floor! eeewww...


Anonymous said...

I remember seeing that in Denver when I was in sixth grade(or seventh, maybe both) It was awesome then, but I was also one of those obnoxious kids, so my perspective is a bit different. What I'm sayin is wait thirty years and it will come back around and you can see it again!

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