Friday, August 06, 2010

Have I Ever Mentioned I'm Only Slightly Addicted to Celebrity Gossip?

This drunken blog brought to you by Bombay Sapphire Gin and Target brand diet tonic w/lime1. And also Blue Diamond Habanero BBQ almonds.

OK, so I'm not actually drunk...yet. But I am "nursing" my first gin and tonic and shall work my way through a second likely before the night and I are put to bed.


You know what's really fun?

Singing along to a feel good song while using the paw of a supine cat as a microphone.

Vinny was lying on his favorite pillow - an $80 chiropractic pillow that fits his ass to a tee - minding his own business and I was lying next to him listening to the mp3 player on my new Samsung Captivate smartphone and singing to him. He stretched out his paw to me - likely to try to get me to quidit - but I took it as a sign to use his outstretched limb like I would a hairbrush.

He wasn't particularly happy.

But it made me happy.

I don't like to admit it, but the song I was singing to him was Chris Brown's Forever.

I was introduced to this song through a youtube video that I cannot watch without bursting into happy tears2.

I do not like admitting that I own this song for two reasons. A) It's kind of an embarrassing song to like when you're a punk rock goth goddess3 and B) I can't stand the fact that I supported Chris Brown's career after he did this to his girlfriend, Rihanna:

photo compliments of NY Daily News

However, I did make a donation to a battered women's shelter after I'd downloaded the single...not that it makes it any better but let's just say that my donation to the shelter was much much muchmuchmuch larger than the 99 cents I paid to download the song from itunes.

Therefore, I am almost guilt free when I listen to the song...but not quite.


Since it's Friday - and you know I like that - I came home from work, stripped down to underthings, and took a much desired nap.

During aforementioned nap, I dreamed a very strange little dream that's stuck with me so you shall now be tormented with hearing about it.

I dreamed that I was with my friend, Matt, who lived next door to the Phoenix family. And by Phoenix family I mean THE Phoenix family - one in which River Phoenix was still alive.

Now, I don't make a habit of dreaming about celebrities...particularly not dead ones. But, as you all may recall from this post, River was no ordinary influence on my life.

In the dream, we went over to the Phoenix family home for some reason...I don't know what...and there we found River at about the age he was when he died and a young Joaquin, still known as Leaf. Mother Phoenix had The Commodores' Easy playing throughout the house on a loop...

And I was dancing with River and then kissing him and trying to give him all my most positive, happy energy...because I knew he was going to be dead in just a short time and wanted to heal him.

And then I was dancing with a Space Camp era Leaf...for the same reason.

And then I woke up. It made me feel all verklempty.

I think I know what drove the dream - and it has nothing to do with River or Joaquin...because that would be just plain weird. I can't talk about it - no really, legally I can't talk about it - but I do know what's driving these subconscious feelings of powerlessness. And it sucks.

In other celebrity death news, who here is applauding loudly at the sound of the death of Mel Gibson's career?

Hey, Mel. I'm working on my second quite strong G&T and guess what? No racial epithets, no rants, no bigoted ramblings or rages are emitting from my mouth. I hope this shuts you the fuck up once and for all.

I was going to talk about Lindsay Lohan's stay in jail but instead I'm just going to shake my head and mutter *tut tut*.

And finally, Hermione Granger - aka Emma Watson - has cut her hair.

Now I know some of you don't believe this is news...and it's not really. But those of us who think Emma Watson is the cutest of the cute and have a slightly possibly pedophilic-like crush on her, I must admit that this new haircut of hers has me all adrool...

photo compliments of

She now sort of reminds me of a young Jennifer Jason Leigh. Except, you know, with personality.

1: I can totally shop at Target again because the CEO apologized for that whole backing of that conservative pig, y'all.

2: Shuddup.

3: And apparent hippy momma but that's another post for another time.

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