Thursday, January 28, 2010

Goose Poop...

It's everywhere you want to be.

That's right. The geese are migrating and have landed in several places I frequent -including work and home.

Subsequently, everywhere I go is covered in a lovely layer of green goose poop.

Now, I happen to like geese. I like to feed them bad for them foods and I like the way they walk, talk, and chase each other.

Once, I even got chased by a one-legged goose who either thought I resembled his favorite snack or just did not like the looks of my knee caps. Whatever. Watching him hop after me - quite rapidly I might add - was hysterical...and a little scary. He'd clearly gotten used to being one-legged and was much quicker than he looked.

The problem is that I am already fighting a losing battle against the bowels of the pigeons who hang out on the power lines strung along both sides of my street. My car, freshly washed, will be covered in pigeon excrement1 within 12 hours. And that shit2 will not come off.

So I'd really prefer it if the geese would poop somewhere else and I'd happily come to them to give them the food love.

1: Another great word. Ex-cre-ment.
2: Literally.

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