Wednesday, September 01, 2010

Why You Gotta Be Like That?

Disclaimer: I don't know where this will go. This has been bubbling to the surface from my sub-conscious.

Women are really mean to one another.

I don't know why this is.

But. It's like...we hold each other to a higher standard than we do men.

I'm not talking exclusively about sex here. I'm not really talking about the double standard slut vs. stud. I'm just talking about general meanness. Judgment.

There seem to be behaviors that, when exhibited by a man, most women shrug their shoulders and think, "Eh. He's a man. What do you expect?" and then go about their everyday business. However, when a woman displays the exact same behavior the world stops and the swift fist of female judgment swings down like a gavel and the end result is typically tears...occasional scratches and bite marks. Possibly chunks of hair littering the battle ground.

And I don't understand.

Is it biological?

Is it a result of insecurities, jealousies, the absence of chemical investments (i.e. sexual attraction)?

I don't think that's entirely it. Sure, those are a part of it. But certainly not all.

I've expressed an opinion of concern before...the exact same opinion a male friend has expressed...about a mutual friend. Our friend merely poo poo'd the words of our male friend but hell fire and damnation rained upon my head for voicing my concerns.

Why?

Were the words more powerful because they came from a woman? Certainly the opinion wasn't coming from a place of jealousy or insecurity. It wouldn't appear that the reaction manifested from those places either.

Is the friendship with me less valuable even though both relationships are platonic?

Do we get something from our male/female relationships - particularly platonic relationships - that we do not get from our female/female relationships?

Are we less invested? And, if so, why would we be less invested based on gender alone?

Maybe it's because women are more likely to be honest with each other than with men thus creating a situation where reactions are much more intense because there is mis-directed/suppressed anger toward men?

It doesn't make any sense.

Maybe I don't make any sense.

Regardless, I hate this about women. We need to be...nicer to one another.

It's one thing to set a standard for the people in our lives, to hold them accountable for behaviors, and to also adjust standards based solely on the person not the potential. It's another thing entirely to adjust those standards depending solely on someone's gender.

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