Sunday, December 05, 2010

The (Non)Wonder Year

December 4: Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

I'll admit it...when this #reverb10 prompt was delivered to my inbox shortly after midnight Saturday morning, I wasn't interested.

I suppose I'm still not terribly interested in it...writing about wonder.

In fact, I avoided writing anything at all on this prompt yesterday - allowable by the rules of #reverb10 as there is no rule that you must write when prompted every single day - and, frankly, ignored thinking about it.

The question I'm asking myself this morning though is why? Why am I avoiding it? It's not an awful question. It actually appears to be a rather lighthearted question - a question to summon child-like joy.

I think that's the answer.

2010 was not a year of child-like wonder and joy. 2010 was a year of teaching, zen stick tapping, helping others cultivate the best in themselves. And even though it was a year of brand new experiences, those experiences weren't exactly lighthearted. They weren't horrible. On the contrary, some of those experiences were deeply meaningful. They just resonated with my old soul. Not my young one.

I felt old this year.

I felt wrinkled, creaking, saggy.

Dimmed.

I'm too young to feel this old.

So...2011. What I want for 2011.

I just now re-visited my first entry for #reverb10 and the word I selected for 2011. Adventure. Adventures happen when you approach experiences with a sense of wonder and curiosity and not the idea that you've been here, done that.

I expended most of my carefully conjured energy on other people in 2010 and asked for little in return. As a result, I'm feeling the effects of a drastically depleted account.

Thus, 2011 will be about making regular deposits into my energy bank and doling out withdrawals in ways that will foster curiosity, wonder, and...dare I say it, feelings of youth.

In 2011, I want to be the grasshoppa.

4 comments:

wholly jeanne said...

now that's a fine plan, grasshoppa.

mark said...

This is dripping with wonder, to my eyes. Mainly, the wonder of what happens next?

lifeafterbenjamin said...

I love that you returned to the prompt. Wishing you a 2011 where the energy returns to you.

rebecca said...

Awesome response. I didn't have much wonder either, so I can relate. I love this and I think you are on the perfect track for making amazing deposits into your soul this year. Good luck! :)